Kilby Goes Off Again, Doug Snags the Cup, and Beeg Adds Ground in Week 6!

Just when we thought the standings were settling in, Week 6 decided to throw a wrench in the gears. We saw some heavyweight ties, a photo-finish for the Homer Cup, and a performance from the basement that makes Ben long for the days of post-draft Power Rankings.

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MASH Monsters & Top Performers

While some managers were treading water, one man was swimming like a shark. The MASH Monster title for Week 6 goes to Bro Bichette (Kilby), who absolutely dismantled the league with a staggering MASH of 70-36-4! After a shaky start to the season, Zach is officially putting the league on notice.

Not far behind him were some familiar faces looking for redemption:

• Staff Infection (Turg): Put up a very impressive 66-34-10 MASH.
• Welcome to the Jungle (Neate): Continued his strong 2026 campaign with a 64-40-6 MASH performance.

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Matchup Mayhem: The Official Results

It was a week of stalemates and narrow escapes in Freddy Beach:

• Bro Bichette (Kilby) outlasted JOBU (Jojo) 5-4-1.
• TNTNT (Bruce and Joe) edged out The Beetle Bunch (Beetle) 6-4-0.
• Staff Infection (Turg) took down Ricky Vaughn (Forge) 5-3-2.
• Welcome to the Jungle (Neater) and BaseOnBalls (Joel) fought to a 4-4-2 tie.
• Air Yordan (G) and chicksDigtheLongball (The Commish) ended in a 5-5-0 tie.
• Bronx Bombers (DT) and Handsy McNasty (Ads) also battled to a 5-5-0 tie.

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Focus on the Big Stories

The Homer Cup: A Photo Finish! 🏆

We had a classic shootout for the Homer Cup this week between DT and G. Both teams slugged 13 HRs, leaving it all up to the tiebreaker. By the narrowest of margins—just 5 fewer at-bats—Bronx Bombers (Doug) takes the trophy! G was looking for back-to-back cups after winning in Week 5, but Doug's efficiency wins the day.

The Power Ranking Curse?

During the annual post-draft power rankings, G famously wouldn't commit to Beetle having the worst team in the league. It was a nice gesture at the time, but Ben seems determined to prove that G was just being polite. With another week in the cellar and a MASH performance that would make a Triple-A team weep, Ben is making a very strong case that he was unhappy with the chips, dip, and beer choices this year and wants to make a change next year (more seltzers, perhaps?).

Joel's "Sanity" Check

After last week's absolute disaster—an embarrassing 10-0 sweep and a failed appeal to the "Fantasy Baseball Gods"—Walks managed to actually show up this week. While a 4-4-2 tie against Neate isn't exactly a parade-worthy result, at least he remembered how to pitch 30 innings and didn't get swept. Progress!

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This Week's Hard Luck Award 😢

The award for statistical suffering goes to Welcome to the Jungle (Neate). Neater posted the 3rd-best MASH in the entire league (64-40-6). In almost any other matchup, that's a blowout win. Instead, he got stuck in a mud-fight with Joel and had to settle for a 4-4-2 tie. It's the second week in a row Neate has had a winning MASH but failed to secure the H2H victory. The "Jungle" is starting to feel a bit cursed.

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This Week's "Got Away With One" Award 🍀

This week's luckiest managers are the league leaders: TNTNT (The Thompson Boys). Bruce and Joe put up a bottom-four MASH performance (46-59-5), yet they somehow walked away with a 6-4 victory. When you're at the top, sometimes the schedule just smiles on you—and facing the weekly Dumpster Fire definitely helps.

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Dumpster Fire of the Week: Beetle's Basement 🔥

There is no sugar-coating this one. The Beetle Bunch (Ben) recorded a league-low MASH of 27-77-6. To put that in perspective, Ben would have lost to almost everyone in the league in nearly every category. While he kept the H2H score respectable at 4-6, the underlying stats suggest this team is currently a five-alarm fire.

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Standings Snapshot

The top of the mountain remains crowded!

1. TNTNT (36-20-4) - Bruce and Joe hold onto 1st place.
2. Bro Bichette (35-21-4) - Kilby is surging and within striking distance.
3. Welcome to the Jungle (34-22-4) - Neate stays in the top 3 despite the hard luck.

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12. The Beetle Bunch (19-40-1) - Ben is officially the beer-and-chips favorite.

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Good luck in Week 7! ☘️