G Falls 👇, Handsy Gets Fisted 👊, Beetle Rolls On 🚗: Week 4 Wrap

Alright, Week 4 is done and dusted! Let's dive into the chaos, the triumphs, and the downright embarrassing moments from around Freddy Beach Baseball.

...and what a week it was! We saw basement dwellers rise up, former MASH monsters stumble, and the league leader just keep doing his thing. The title says it all, but let's break it down.

MASH Monster & Top Performers

Shout out to the Bronx Bombers (Doug) for absolutely crushing it this week, putting up a league-best MASH of 71-30-9! That's a dominant performance, leading the charge in HR and NSVH. Also flexing their muscles were Ricky Vaughn (Forgy) who was number 2 62-39-9 and TNTNT right behind them at 61-44-5.

Matchup Mayhem: The Official Results

Here's how the Week 4 slugfests ended:

• Staff Infection stunned Handsy McNasty 7-3
• Bronx Bombers handled Welcome to the Jungle 6-2-2
• Ricky Vaughn dispatched Bro Bichette 6-4
• The Beetle Bunch clipped chicksDigtheLongball 6-4
• TNTNT defeated Air Yordan 6-4
• JOBU outpaced BaseOnBalls 7-2-1

Beetle Rolls On... 🚗

Let's start with the steady hand at the top. The Beetle Bunch just keeps finding ways to win. Facing a solid effort from The Commish, Ben pulled out another 6-4 victory. While not his most dominant MASH week (5th place, 60-44-6), he did lead the league with a blistering .305 AVG and got wins where needed. That's how you stay #1 in the standings (now 29-10-1) – consistent performance and clutch wins. Beetle continues to be a problem?

G Falls... Hard 📉

From the top to the bottom. Rough week for Air Yordan (Garrett). G not only lost his matchup 4-6 to TNTNT, but his squad put up the WORST MASH score of the week, a measly 27--79-4 record. Finishing near the bottom in RBI, NW, K/9, WHIP, and ERA will do that to you. After showing some life, this performance drops Air Yordan into a tie for last place overall. Gravity hurts, G. (Commisioner's Note: The AI has no concept of tiebreakers, but we're looking into it, sorry Turg, but we will get that sorted out)

...And Handsy Gets FISTED! 👊

Oh, Adam. Oh, Handsy McNasty. Where do we even begin? This wasn't just a loss; it was a 3-7 humiliation at the hands of... STAFF INFECTION?! Yes, you read that right. The same Turg who was the league's laughingstock and undisputed Dumpster Fire champion the last two weeks rose from the ashes to absolutely dismantle Ads. Making it even sweeter (or saltier, for Ads), Turg actually put up a respectable MASH score (7th, 58-47-5), while Handsy cratered with the second-worst MASH of the week (34-73-3). Ads finished bottom-3 across the league in Runs, Homers, RBI, Steals, and Batting Average. Getting beaten is one thing, but getting boat-raced by the guy who couldn't manage a win if his life depended on it the previous weeks? That's not only rough, buddy, that's getting fisted.

This Week's Hard Luck Award 😢

Tough break for chicksDigtheLongball (Luke). The Commish put up a solid performance, ranking 6th in MASH for the week (59-49-2), only to run into the buzzsaw that is The Beetle Bunch and lose a close 4-6 matchup. Winning RBI and hitting .277 just wasn't quite enough. Sometimes, a good week just isn't good enough against the top dog.

This Week's "Got Away With One" Award 🍀

Not to heap too much praise on him, the luckiest winner has to be Turg (Staff Infection). Yes, he won 7-3, and yes, his MASH was miles better than his previous efforts, but let's be real: he benefited massively from facing Handsy McNasty during an absolute meltdown week. Turg's pitching was still mediocre (bottom half in ERA, WHIP, K/9), but his bats woke up just enough against an opponent who seemingly forgot how to hit entirely. Congrats on the win, Turg, but you definitely caught a major break facing Ads this week.

Turg also won his second Homer Cup 🏆 of the season, with 11. Although Doug tied him with 11 homers, Turg's squad reached that total with 30 fewer at bats. Congrats, buddy!

Standings Snapshot

After 4 weeks:

• The Beetle Bunch remains #1 (29-10-1)
• JOBU holds onto #2 (24-13-3)
• TNTNT stays at #3 (24-14-2)
• ...and down in the depths, Staff Infection and Air Yordan are now tied for last place (13-25-2)

That's the dirt for Week 4! What a shakeup at the bottom, while Beetle keeps cruising. Let's see if Turg can build on this, if Ads can recover from the embarrassment, and if G can escape the basement.

Good luck in Week 5! 🍀